Journaling for Rope Bottoms

This article is part of a series of advice for rope bottoms, written by Mya and Fox. We’ve been doing rope intensively for 10 years. Mya has bottomed with a wide variety of rope tops, and Fox has worked as a top with many rope bottoms.

Why keep a rope journal?

We as humans don’t have the best memories. Worse, we’re not typically aware of how our memory fails us - we often forget things or misremember them without realizing it. That’s why writing things down is so helpful. As most of us engage with rope bondage over a long period of time - typically over the course of several years, with varying frequency - we have found it hugely useful to keep a journal so we can track progress, identify and recognize patterns in our rope practice, and make note of how our bodies and preferences evolve. Different bottoms have different preferences in their journaling style. You might love writing, or you might enjoy visuals more. Adapt to what works best for you. Ideally, journaling about your rope should be a pleasurable activity, adding to your enjoyment of rope in general rather than feeling like boring homework or a chore. How much you write is also up to you, some people fill pages about every scene, and some jot down just a few words. Neither is wrong, it’s just a matter of personal choice.

What goes into your rope bottom journal?

Ideally your rope journal will have some structure. The more you are able to capture consistent information from one scene to the next, and always in the same format, the easier it will be for you to go back and use that information meaningfully. Below are some suggestions as to what to include, but remember, make the journal your own. If some aspects feel irrelevant to you, or if you feel there is something missing, customize to your own needs.

The details of the tie

• The context of the tie
  • Where were you? Was it a nice, cozy and quiet space? Was it a noisy rope jam with many people around?
  • Who was tying you? Were there other people involved in the scene?
  • What was the date, day of the week and time of day? You might find that timing changes things more than you’d expect.
  • What was the purpose of the tie? Was it a play, photoshoot, labbing? Was this scene planned in advance or was it pick-up-play?
  • What negotiation style did you use with your rigger? Inclusive or exclusive? (more on those in an upcoming article) Did you learn something new about this partner during the pre-tie discussion, such as their preference for aftercare?
• What physical state were you in going into the tie?
  • When did you last eat before tying? What type of food did you eat, and what quantities? We find that many bottoms develop preferences over time about food timings in relation to rope, and those vary wildly.
  • How hydrated were you?
  • Did you sleep well the night before? Were you tired before the scene began?
  • Before the first rope was put on, what sort of mood were you in? What was your energy level?
  • Was any part of your body sore or hurting before the rope?
  • Were there any events immediately before that tie that might affect the experience? A stressful day at work, already tied twice before this scene, etc.
• How were you tied?
  • What positions were you in during the scene? This can be one main position or multiple you transitioned through. Did you start the tie standing up, sitting down, lying down? Here, visuals are often helpful. You can include photos of the positions if you have any, or do a simple drawing (Mya likes to use stick figure drawings :) )
  • What rope patterns were used on your body? For example: a futo on the left leg, a gravity boot on the right foot, and an arms free chest harness anchored at the front. Filling in this might need you to learn more about the names of different patterns. That’s not a bad thing - the more you know about rope the better.
  • How long were you in rope in total? How much of that was in suspension? It can be hard to estimate time in rope, because your perceptions can get affected by “rope space”. Your rigger might be able to help estimate the time ; a vague estimate is better than nothing.
• How did your physical state change after the tie?
  • What marks did you have on your body? How “heavy” were they? Did you like the way they looked?
  • Did you experience any physical symptoms coming out of the rope? Where were they located in your body?
    • numbness
    • “pins and needles”
    • physical weakness
  • Did you experience an altered state of consciousness, such as “rope space” during or after this scene? How long did that last?
• If you like counting and measuring, it can be a good idea to give a unique sequence number to each rope session you bottom for. If you’re just beginning, you can number all your scenes from 1. If you’re already partway in your rope journey, you can number them by year (2026-1, 2026-2, etc.)

How you felt during the scene

Every rope scene is not only a physical journey but also an emotional one. Exploring and understanding your reactions to rope is critical to developing as a rope bottom - it will help both yourself and your partner know better what to expect in future scenes. - How did you feel during the tie? How about immediately after? Were your mood and energy level affected by the scene? - What came up? Did unexpected thoughts or memories enter your head as you were being tied? How did you feel about the rigger? Strongly connected, or distant? How did that feel? - Did you speak up during the tie about anything? How did your rigger react if you did? How easy or hard was it to share what you needed to? “Please can you dress the wrap on my right hip?” or “I don’t like it when you put rope on my toes.”, for instance. - What were your 3 favorite and 3 least-favorite things about this scene?

Learnings

• Did you discover something new during this scene? About yourself, rope, a certain tie, your connection with riggers, etc.
• Did it confirm something you already suspected about yourself?
• Was this rigger a good match for you, and for what your intents (see our article on rope intents here) were today?

How do you make use of it in the long term?

Review your journal with a specific question in mind

As your rope life develops, certain questions will come up. It might be something you’re wondering, or a question someone else asks you. Examples might include: - How many suspensions have I done this year? - An inversion didn’t go well - have I had issues with inversions in the past? - This rigger I used to tie with is coming back to town. How did it go last time? What were their needs during that scene, and what were mine? Would I want to tie with them again? - How much experience do I have being in strappados? - I got injured in this scene. What factors of the scene can explain the injury? Were there previous scenes that stressed this same body part and could have caused cumulative damage? - I want to enter a certain headspace during my rope scene. What kinds of interactions, styles, ties, etc. have helped make me feel this way in the past?

In those cases, your rope journal is a powerful tool to get answers. Flip back through the pages to find what you need, or if your bottoming journal is in electronic form, use the search feature.

Relive fond memories

As you age and go through life, you might develop nostalgia for your early days in rope. Having kept a journal is a treasure - like a precious photo album from years long past, it can allow you to dive back into the past and feel great joy at your greatest moments in bondage.

Using it as an inspiration for future scenes and creative endeavors

The material you capture can also be tapped as a source for all kinds of projects, depending on your hobbies and skill sets. You could for example: - Write erotic stories using elements of your real life scenes (as we have done many times!) - Draw or paint some of your favorite rope positions - Write a letter to a partner about that scene you two did last year that you both really loved - Develop a rope performance around a new position you’ve found that you really enjoy

Keep your rope journal safe!

If someone else finds your rope journal, it might end up disclosing very private things about you. (see our Privacy for Rope Bottoms article.) If it’s a physical journal, treat it like a very private diary! Keep it away from prying eyes, maybe under lock and key. It would be tragic if you were to lose your notebook full of your priceless rope experiences, so consider making a backup in some form. Taking photos of each page and keeping those in a well secured folder, maybe on a cloud storage service you trust, is a useful failsafe. If you prefer an all-electronic journal, there are many apps such as Obsidian, Scrivener or Evernote that fit the bill. Make sure your files are password protected and encrypted, and backed up so that a single device breaking or being stolen does not cause you to lose your information.

Take it one day at a time

Reading all this might feel overwhelming. But keep in mind, you don’t have to capture every single aspect and angle from day one (or ever!). It’s much better to write an ‘imperfect’ journal than no journal at all. Play with it, find your own way, and hopefully you’ll have gained a new habit that is not only helpful to your bottoming but also a really fun and restorative activity.

A real life example

Mya’s journal only contains suspensions and partial suspensions. She tracks: date, rigger, place, context, the suspension number, the patterns/ties involved and the orientation, she draws a quick stick figure in the position(s) and sometimes includes other info, such as if there were sexy times ; if the scene or suspension was very long ; if anything went ‘wrong’ or she had an injury, or if something unusual happened. She uses an A5 lined note book, and has one page per scene (she has written her way through a number of note books by now!)

This content is copyrighted - please do not copy the content somewhere else. On the other hand, you can absolutely send a link to this page to a friend or play partner!